Weird Dream

I don't talk about my dreams very much on this
blog because I think my dreams are probably
boring to others, but this dream was so odd I
must share and if you have any insights please
let me know :-).
I am in New York City (a place I love). I am living
there and I have an apartment in a high rise building.
This place is so cool it has a grocery store on the top
floor and another floor with five restaurants.
My apartment was really big and wonderful and I
had a great view. At one point I was out on the
sidewalk and I looked up at the building and I thought
to myself "I live in New York!" And like that Talking Heads
song I thought "How did I get here?" I was really happy
to be there though. Then later in the dream it got really
strange and I was in the grocery store in just a t-shirt, no pants.
I kept telling everyone I talked to in the store that
I had to leave my apartment in a hurry :-). No time
for pants. Well that's the dream I hope it wasn't too
boring for you all.
I think the food part is that I am always starving
myself, so always hungry, so I dream about food :-).
The rest I have no idea. I will leave you with a photo
of two of my boys, brothers, Mr. B and Spike.
Have an amusing Sunday.

Time and Energy

This is a blurry photo of my sweet boy Zeus.
I would have never named him that, I let an
old boyfriend name him, silly me :-). He
is more of a Ziggy.
I am wiped out. Spent.
Between my show and my mom (who is a
lot like the energizer bunny :-) I have not
stopped moving for about three weeks until
yesterday. I stayed in jammies yesterday and
did not even shower :-). My mom went off
on her own and I read and worked on two new
little paintings. Besides fixing dinner that is
all I did. I was starting to think perhaps something
was wrong with me I was so tired, but realized, no
honey you are just getting older :-). I need more time
and I need more energy, badly. I could use about
two maybe three weeks off to lay around on some
beach somewhere fun, but not too active, with a
pile of good books and perhaps a lap top. Yes,
that is exactly what I need :-). Anyone out there
want to go with? Missed you. Have a wonderful weekend.

Quickie

No photo, sorry, look at show photos below
if you are bored :-). My mom is here and we
are pretty busy plus I am working, so if I
post at all the rest of the week it will be on
the weekend. Have a wonderful week!

The Show

It was wonderful, in every way. The first
photos are of the first few people who came,
some friends and family, some strangers.
The last two photos are a view of the show
before people arrived. I am sorry the photos
are so blurry, but my hands were shaky :-).
I took many more, but they are either too
blurry or they have people in them, that would
rather not be featured on my blog :-). I had about
seventy or more people show up, many friends, and
many people I had never met before. My sisters
sent me a beautiful vase of flowers and that made
an already great day even more wonderful. Having
my mom and most of my terrific friends there
really made the day for me. My paintings looked
wonderful in the space and the gallery owners
had them lite so beautifully they were shining
like bright stars :-). I wish you all could have been
there! Also the food my mom and I made was a big
hit :-). It was a day to always treasure. Happy Easter
everyone, have a wonderful day!

Calm

That is how I wish I was, calm, like my Buddha.
However, I am not calm. I am nervous and the opposite
of calm :-). I will be away from the computer for the
next couple days as my mom and I have a lot of food
to prepare for the show tomorrow and then the big
day is Saturday. Still have no idea what I am wearing,
so if you pray, please send up a few for me :-). Once I
am there and surrounded by people I adore, I will be fine.
It is just the pre show jitters. I promise to take a few
photos and give you a full report on Sunday. I attempted
a photo of the invite card, but it was too blurry.
Have a wonderful next couple days!

Spring

I think Spring is finally here, though I can't
be sure, we sometimes get snow in April :-).
This photo is of my cats Mr.B and Spike. They
are brothers, can't you tell :-).
My mom arrived yesterday and we will be making
the food for my show, galleries today want you to
pay for half of the show costs, so I decided to save
money I would make the food. I am getting excited
about the show, but trying not to have any expectations.
It will be a fun party and most of my favorite people
will be there. Still have not figured out what to wear!
The show is this Saturday and I have not a clue.
I am trusting I will figure it out :-). I am hoping to
find something new to wear, but the stores in my
little mecca are less than desired. And has anyone
noticed that blouses these days are getting smaller?
I have me some breasts and even though I am small
around the hips I need a large in a blouse, and I think they are
making them these days for woman with no shoulders and
no bust. Am I the only one having this problem?
As you can tell I am just talking drivel today, so I will
say goodbye now before I go on :-). Have a special Wednesday.

Gratitude

I hope if you ever get tired of seeing too cute
photos of my boys you will kindly keep it to
yourselves :-). Here are Max and Zeus. They
really love each other and they both own the
sofa :-). Today I am thinking of gratitude. I
was over at Simply wait and I was reading about
Patry's stories about dealing with cancer and
her having to have surgery again and like always
I was struck by her joy and bravery in the face
of it all. I have been cranky like I say and whining
to myself about things and after reading her post
I was so ashamed of myself. We all have so much.
If we are healthy we really have everything. All
else is gravy :-). We have shelter and most of us have cars.
Many of us have lovely animal companions and some have
kids and some lucky folks have both :-). Most of us can
afford at least the basics without too much trouble.
We are double blessed if we have family and friends who
love us. In blogging land we also have blog friends to
be thankful for :-). Life is truly what you make it.
Focusing on all the troubles and evils of the world will
just get you more of it. I for one have learned my lesson
today and hopefully I will remember Patry's words tomorrow
and the next day too. Words to live by always. If you know
what is good for you, go read her post, it is anything, but
a downer. Have a gorgeous Tuesday everyone.
And thanks for all the birthday wishes :-).

Birthday

Today is my birthday. I am getting of an
age when I am no longer thrilled that I am
getting older. Remember when we were really
young, like 8 or 9 and we could not wait until
we were 12 :-)? Remember how slowly time
seemed to go? It is absolutely true that time
goes faster as you get older. It must be quiet a
blur when you get up into your nineties. I have
been a bit cranky the last couple days, I think
stress and PMS are to blame. I have also been
thinking of blame. When things don't go our way
we often pick someone or something to blame.
My feeling is that everything is us. I am not saying
that we should blame ourselves, I mean that there
is nothing and no one to blame for anything. I know
this is not a popular idea and even will make some
people mad. That's okay. I have a lot of ideas that
are not popular :-). It appears as if there is always
something outside of ourselves that we can say
caused us unhappiness, God, our boyfriend, our
parents, President Bush. I think everything is responding
to us, and that if we don't like the response, we must
look inside ourselves and find the way to change. Some
will say, what about the little child who dies? Stuff
like that is hard to understand, but I really believe that
we choose ahead of time what will happen to us, to some
degree. It gets a bit complex because I think fate and free
will are both true :-). Wrap your mind around that and it
becomes a bit easier to see how things work. Of course
I could be totally wrong about all of this and I have an
open mind enough to listen to what others think and say.
I just find my day goes better if I work on myself and
stop blaming the world for what is wrong in my life. I
do know how tempting it is and I still do it when I am
cranky, like now. I want to blame Mr. B for why we
aren't working out, but I know in my heart it is inside me.
Just something to think about. Have a great day everyone!

Paintings 2

Hi. This is the second painting and the last photo
is the finished product. Next one up is midway and
above that is a shot of one of the sides and the top
photo is a shot of one of the sides of the other painting
that I forgot to include yesterday. I hope you like :-).
I got some encouraging news yesterday, I took
both the new little paintings into the gallery I most
want to be in and the owner loved them, a lot. It is
only a matter of time before I get in that gallery and
then I can look forward to painting full time, because
the man makes stars out of his artists :-). I feel like
my dreams are winding their way to coming true.
That is all for today, it is another busy day, but hopefully
I will have a couple calm days before the show. Have a
wonderful Sunday!

Paintings

Hi. I missed you. I have been crazy busy and I will
spare you the details because they are boring :-).
Here is one of the little 6"x6" paintings I did. The first
photo is the finished painting. The second one is mid way
and the last one is after the board has been plastered and I
have carved into it.
I hope you like it after all my hype :-). It is my favorite
of the two which is why I am showing it first.
It is another busy day, but I promised you this and
I try not to break my promises. I will show you the other
painting tomorrow. I am hoping to have a bit more time
tomorrow, so I can look around and catch up on your posts.
Have a wonderful Saturday!

Hey

I don't have much time and no photo today, but
wanted to let you know I will be disappearing
for a couple days to get things done before my
mom arrives. I finished the paintings and will
post photos of them on Saturday. I think they
turned out quiet well and I am very happy with
them. Have a wonderful rest of the week.
Big hugs to you all :-).

My sweet dog

This is my dog Zeus, isn't he darling?
Just a quickie, no time today, but
wanted to say hi and share this photo.
Have a wonderful day everyone!

Snow pictures

These are the rest of the snow pictures I took
last week. The snow is now melting and turning
into brown, icky mud. I think you all know how I
feel about mud. It is really hard to run in. I am a trail
runner, so that is making it difficult to get my running
done. Wish I had a treadmill :-). Due to pot holes, mad
dogs and crazy men, it is really not safe to run in the streets
here. Downtown is okay, but I don't live down town.
I made out the rest of my invites and tonight I hope to
finish those paintings :-). This is a busy week, but I will
post when and if I can. I will be thinking of you all though,
even if I disappear :-). Have a wonderful week.

Love

This post is dedicated to all the people I love.
I got this lovely idea from Nina and you should
go read her and her friend Julie. Another funny
person I adore is Neil. For pure beauty in writing
go see Patry. If you want to see some beautiful art
go see Jessie , she will inspire you. Another wonderful
artist is Geraint, he is also a good friend, so buy some
of his photos, they are breathtaking. Go see Bernie if
you love animals. If you are like me and love all things
Morroccan go see Maryam . There are many more
people I love, but that will have to do for today.
Not much going on with me right now, just work and
painting. I almost have one of the little ones done.
I painted a couple hours last night after work. I can't
wait to post them for you. I hope you all like the little
video I made of my cat Max, see below...My first video,
it was so fun I may make some more. I can see it totally
taking over and me getting nothing else done :-).
I am feeling pretty good today and happy and full of
energy. May you all have a gorgeous Sunday.

Max being bad

This is a little video I made myself...:-)

Snow

This is what I woke to on Thursday after a day
of Spring like sunny weather. I have a bunch more
photos I took, but blogger won't upload them and
I am getting tired of trying. Perhaps tomorrow.
I got a lot done the last couple days. I got nearly
all my invite cards made out and sent and I have
the two little paintings well on their way to being
almost half way done :-). I am taking photos of the
various steps in my journey with these paintings and
I will post them when I finish. I am really loving the
tiny format and have an idea to do a group of them
in the near future. They are only 6"x6" and so cute.
It is good I have this show to work on and my mom's
visit. It gives me a lot less time to think about what
is happening with Mr. B. I really don't know the future,
but it is not looking good. To tell you the truth I have
some anger that is masking how I really feel about
him, so at this point I am not sure what I feel. I am
letting that be okay instead of agonizing over it.
I am perfectly alright with standing on my own and
being alone. I had so much hope for us and that is the
hardest thing to let go of. However, life is funny the
way it surprises you, so while today it is a no go, tomorrow
could change on a dime. I hope you are all having a
wonderful weekend :-).

Life in general

Here is my main man-cat, Spike, he is the boss
even over my dog, though Max is trying to steal
his position :-). Sorry I disappeared for a day, it was
crazy busy at work and home, so time was limited.
My mother is coming for my show which is very sweet
and supportive, but I have much to do to get ready for
her and my show, so I will blog when I can. I will be
taking the next two days off to work on paintings. I am
abandoning my big painting, so I can work on some smaller
ones, ones I might actually have time to finish before my
show:-). I am a bit overwhelmed with life right now, but
it is all good. Still working out my feelings for Mr.B and
lots of other stuff right now. Sometimes it takes time to
sort through all the garbage in your mind :-). I promise
a really good post over the weekend. Have a wonderful
rest of the week. I love you.

Words fail...

Here is another picture of Max sitting in a bag of my
laundry :-). He is so bad, but cute. This is another
day when I have lots on my mind, but so little to say :-).
I am thinking about love and loss and what it all means.
Heavy stuff. Perhaps I will be able to put some of my
thoughts into words tomorrow :-). Have a great day!

Obsession

No photo today, sorry. No time, no time, no time :-).
I have been thinking about obsession and passion.
To me they are much the same thing. If something
like a book, movie or a painting or a person catches
my interest and they prove to be really fascinating I
can get hooked in and become obsessed. The things
that I have become passionate about I have become
obsessed with. For a while in my younger years I
thought I had to tap down my enthusiasm and be
like normal people. I did manage to do it for a while,
but then I started to really miss my obsessive nature
and I decided if I only used it for good I could unleash
it again :-). I am so much happier. My latest obsessions
are running, and Viggo (see older posts).
Some passions last and some go away. My passion
for painting and art have been with me my whole life and
they will never leave me. Other passions last only a short
while and then I move on. As it is I have so many obsessions
I could spend 24 hours a day doing them all and still not have
enough time. Life is too short to not be passionate. Why
bother living if you don't really give yourself over to feeling
with your whole heart :-). Have a wonderful Sunday.

Grace

This is an image of a little thing I made long ago.
My first and only attempt at sculpture :-).
I made a lot of headway on my painting while I took a
break from my computer. I was not loving it, but now
I like it a lot :-). I am taking photos of it a long the way
and I will post them when I am all done.
I also watched "Michael Clayton" loved the movie and
I thought the acting was perfect. Tilda Swinton was the most
amazing of all. She deserved that award!
Today I am thinking about grace and how most days
I am very lucky to have a lot of it in my life. There is no way
I could have gotten through most of the traumas I have
experienced without it. Somehow no matter how bad things
have ever been in my life I always feel that there is some reason
and I get this feeling of peace and it is as if angels sprinkle
angel dust on me and I am good to go for a while more.
When I was younger I had a lot of bad things happen, but
now I don't have many traumas, which I am grateful for.
I still have sad times, but again the angel dust comes and
I move through it with a smile. I call that love dust grace.
I can sometimes even feel the wings of the angels brushing
past me :-). Have a wonderful weekend everyone.
P.S. I am not sure what those funny bars are under the photo.
I was trying to post a photo of Viggo Mortensen :-), but it
would not work, so perhaps that made everything go weird.