Friday, October 31, 2008

Happy Halloween!

I am sorry, I could do no better than this little pumpkin,
it will have to do. I have been feeling overwhelmed and
a bit sad about some things, so I am not posting much.
I will try to do better next week. One thing I am learning
that I will share with you more later, is that everything is
perfect just as it is, acceptance is the key to happiness. I
am working on it :-). Happy weekend! XOXO

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Grand Opening of my Esty shop!

Finally, I have my Esty shop up and running (I think).
I plan on adding many new items in the next few weeks,
more cards, ornaments and ceramics (if they turn out :-),
and eventually more small paintings. I will always keep
you posted when I add new things.
Any feedback is most welcome :-).
Have a wonderful week everyone.

Sunday, October 26, 2008


This is a photo I took the other day while running, weird
cloud formation. I am done with my rooms. Pure bliss as today
I can work on art, which is what I am going to go do right now :-).
Please tell me what gives you bliss today?
Happy Sunday! XOXO

Thursday, October 23, 2008


Taking a break to give you an update as to my progress
in the switching of the rooms.
I am down to 8 piles of things I know not what to do with
and 2 closets to transfer, plus a very neglected and dirty
house to clean, but I can see the end of the tunnel ;-).
What has been taking me so long is the fact that I have
to go through everything and purge. It seems like the
thing to do. It needed to be done long ago and this forces
me to do it. Why, oh why, do we (I) hang on to useless things
way past the point of ever in my wildest dreams using
said useless thing? Like for instance a 25 year old tennis
racket. Even if I did decide on a whim to take up tennis again,
this racket is obsolete! Out it goes! Many items like this are
leaving and I am feeling lighter and lighter as I fill up
one trash bag after another. I am also giving much that is
still useful away. Do any of you have this probelm of hanging
on? There is still a lot I could let go of, but I am just not
ready yet. One tiny step at a time...
Share with me your stories of hanging on and letting go.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Be Brave

I read this poem on Raven's blog, I had to share.
"I will not die an unlived life.
I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days,to allow my living to open me,
to make me less afraid, more accessible, to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing,
a torch, a promise.
I choose to risk my significance,
to live so that which came to me as seed
goes to the next as blossom,and that which came to me as blossom,goes on as fruit."
~by Dawna Markova (I Will Not Die an Unlived Life)
:-). XOXO

Sunday, October 19, 2008


Just peeking in for a minute to let you know what I am up to.
For the last 2 days I have been switching my bedroom with my
art/office room. One reason I switched them is because I need
more room for my art stuff and the bedroom was bigger.
This project has proved to be more intense than I had first
thought :-). I am sitting here in a mess beyond belief.
I will get most of it done today, however, and just in time for
work tomorrow :-).
I just keep thinking how wonderful it will be when I am finished.
Happy Sunday everyone. XOXO
P.S. All my animal boys hate me right now.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

What made my day magic...

1. My mom got through the procedure just fine.
She is awake and asking for coffee :-). Thanks for your
2. As I was running this morning I saw this bird, I have
seen before, but it always takes my breath away. When
it flies it's wings are this perfect, wonderful shade of
blue. It is a blue so rich and alive I have not seen it
anywhere else in nature. (Note to self, look up this bird
and find out it's name :-).
3. I took photos of more of my art today and got them ready for
my Esty site and picked up fired pieces of my pottery and
dropped off ornaments to fire. All the while thinking how much
I love my job of being an artist, even the business side of it.
4. The fact that I am now going to go work on a large bowl
I started last weekend and get my hands into clay.
What made your day special? Please share. XOXO

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Prayers and positive thoughts...

My mom B is having a procedure done tomorrow.
It is not supposed to be life threatening, but you
just never know. Please send happy thoughts her
way, it could not hurt :-). Thanks. Love you mom.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008


My dog Zeus. Is this not a wonderful shot? I am just peaking
in to say hi and give you this little gift of love. XOXO

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Holiday Craft

Max helping me make Christmas cards :-).

A closer look at the cards.

Ornaments in the raw clay stage.
This is how I have been spending the last couple of days.
Having so much fun and I find it very relaxing. I also finally
got my Esty shop up, but have many more items to add
before I am ready to have my grand opening, I am
very close and you all will be the first I tell.
Let me know what you think so far...
I will leave you with this quote by Willem de Kooning that says it all for me:
I can't help it.
I stayed in this world of childish wonder,
I think that a lot of creative people never grow up.
I am certain a real man would not paint any pictures!
Or wonder about the universe
Or believe in dreams.
Or think that trees sometimes look at him.
Have a wonderful Sunday!

Thursday, October 9, 2008


I thought it was time to post a photo of a couple of my boys.
This is Spike and Max.
Today, was one of those days. I had so much I wanted to do
and I did none of it except this post. At least I did one thing
today :-). The more I complained to myself about it, the faster
time went. I can't tell you what happened (nothing happened:-).
I think I just puttered around too much. Finally I let
go and made it okay :-). There is always tomorrow, right?
We all seem to have so much to do and run around frantic
to get it all done. Today, midway I stopped and realized I
was not in the moment. I was not in flow. That was almost
enough to set me right again, except I went back into frantic
rather fast and lost it again. Oh, well, time, can't live with it,
can't live without it :-). I hope you all had a grand day!

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

What's up...

I've been busy and unable to post much of read many
blogs the last few days. Working a bit and also making
art which I will show you soon. My Esty shop is coming
soon, it has taken me a while to get it together, but I am
almost there. I have been having a blast making holiday
ornaments to sell on Esty. I have plans to sell
cards as well. When I look at my future I see so much fun
ahead making things and falling in love everyday with clay
and paint :-).
On the family front, please continue to send good thoughts
out for my cousin R. Also my mom could use some too as
she is having some health issues of her own.
Not much for you today. I promise a real post soon.

Friday, October 3, 2008


After yesterday's post I needed to balance things out.
When I hear stories like Vestine's it always challenges
my world view. I thought of nothing else after reading
about her. After much thought I came back around full
circle and said yes, I still believe that most people are
good and kind. Yes, I believe that there is much beauty
and love to be found. I still believe in magic :-). I cannot
let the horror in the world be all I see. I also thought
a lot about the men who did those awful things to Vestine.
What horrors and insanity brought them to be as they are?
I myself have not lived a perfect charmed life. I have seen
my own horrors and those in my family have seen worse than
me and none of us can compare what we went through with what
Vestine has lived. My point is, is that many of us have had trauma
in our lives, but somehow we keep going, we keep smiling.
It must be grace. Grace keeps us alive. Beauty, love, kindness.
Peace and love be with you today and all days.
Photo by Geraint Smith

Thursday, October 2, 2008


I copied this from Yoli, who copied it from Maryam and I must tell you this story is horrific.
When I even think about complaining about my life, I will think about this poor woman and the others like her. This story has affected me like no other. I, like Yoli and Maryam can not look away...

In order to reach as many people as possible I am copying Maryam's ( My Marrakesh ) post to my blog. Please, read and if you find it in your heart to help, please do:

She has a small, neat head, her features delicately sketched, her teeth very white. Her grey suit is too large for her narrow frame but her cream shoes are polished and she moves with a certain elegance on ankles impossibly slim.Her name is Vestine. She's 42 and she survived the Rwandan genocide.Vestine was rounded up one night and held captive in a stadium with others. Left without food, on the fifth day, she began to eat grass, one green blade after another. It was that day, too, that a soldier marched her to the sordid bathroom and ordered her to take off all her clothes. Her hands twisting in her lap, she says,"He told me he wanted to see if Tutsi women were made differently than Hutu women. Then...then he raped me." The next day it was a different soldier, this one trying to force his penis into her mouth. When she protested, he clubbed her on the head. With her fingers lightly tapping her face, Vestine describes how the blood streamed into her eyes and down her nose, as she did what he required.Vestine's story continues, relentless. After they had had their fill of her, you see, the soldiers would force her down on her hands and knees, straddle her back, and ride her around the stadium like a donket, beating the soles of her feet with a stick urging her to go faster and faster.When she was finally brought back to her home, Vestine found her husband and two brothers on the floor, hacked to death by machete. By day, she was raped over and over by a soldier who held her captive. By night, the dogs would come and feast on the rotting bodies of the people she loved most.After weeks, Vestine was ordered to the local Hutu commander's house. Vestine fought back, perhaps her fatal mistake. Her voice faltering, she looks down at her lap and whispers,"The commander took a knife and then he mutilated my genitals, cutting off ....cutting off everything I had left there. Then....then, he made me swallow what he had taken from me."Vestine survived the genocide, rescued by a Hutu neighbor who hid her. Two of her three children also survived, the third was killed by a grenade when he tried to flee into the mountains.It was only seven years later that Vestine -- broken and sick -- found out that she had been infected by HIV/AIDs.Vestine, and thousands like her, are now being helped by AVEGA, a Rwandan NGO dedicated to widows of the genocide. Their funds are small but their hearts are big.Could you, would you find room in your heart to help, too? In a different dark life, in a different dark space, it could have been you, in Vestine's place. It could have been me in Vestine's place.Is fifty dollars too much? Or perhaps 25 dollars if times are tough? Might someone also help me by taking donations via their Paypal account? (I don't have one and can't get one in Morocco.) Any mentions on blogs would be incredibly appreciated, too. Leave a comment or email me at maryam at if you would like to help. I promise you -- with a certainty that is desperately sad -- that this will be the most meaningful money you spend all month.My week has been filled with horror -- I can't look away. Please, please, don't you look away, too.